1. Airplanes can kill you quickly; a woman takes her time.
2. Airplanes can be turned on by a flick of a switch.
3. Airplanes don't get mad if you 'touch and go.'
4. Airplanes don't object to a preflight inspection.
5. Airplanes operate inverted.
6. Airplanes come with manuals to explain their operation.
7. Airplanes have strict weight and balance limits.
8. Airplanes can be flown any time of the month.
9. Airplanes don't come with in-laws.
10. Airplanes don't care about how many other airplanes you have flown before.
11. Airplanes and pilots both arrive at the same time.
12. Airplanes don't complain if you hose them down.
13. Airplanes don't mind if you like to look at other airplanes.
14. Airplanes can get high without throwing up.
15. Airplanes expect to be tied down.
16. Airplanes don't comment on your piloting skills.
17. Airplanes don't whine unless something is really wrong.
18. However, when airplanes go quiet, just like a woman, it's a bad thing.
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